JUly Rider Quotes

Me: "What's the advantage of staying in Conway each year when you visit?" Rider: "The beaches are nicer."(WHAT BEACHES?)

Me: "What kind of work do you do?" Rider: "I'm in death sales. I sell plots, caskets and mausoleums." I can get you 15% off on a casket. Sometimes people ask if they can get the discount later on and I tell them that when it's time, it's too late for the discount."

African American woman from Indianapolis: "Is there a hood here?"  Me: "Yes, but I don't go there often."

Coming off the casino boat the nurse said, "If I jumped off the ship I could have been a mimosa mermaid."(yes, she drank a couple)

After hearing about the Mimosa Mermaid, the bartender said, "I'm going to make that the drink of the day."

"When my grandfather heard I was going to be named Marissa, he hated it.  He said it was the worst name he ever heard and said, "why would anyone name a child that?" (we did and we love it)

"My Dad was voted class clown in high school and my grandfather was too.  When my older brother was not, the pressure was really on me, but I did it without a problem."

"We don't care how badly people drive as long as they are safe. We own a towing business."

"I used to sell life insurance, but I'd much rather talk to people who are 60 with one foot in the grave."  Me: "I won't be 60 for 6 more weeks so I'm good."

Her:"I turned 41 yesterday, but I was 17 the day before." Me: You had a really long day."

Me: "How did you get away for a ten-day vacation?" (young couple) Him: "She convinced me, she is pretty cute." Her: "It really helps to be cute sometimes-maybe he'll propose here."

"We can't buy anything to bring home since we drove the 300 miles from Virginia Beach on a motorcycle."

"When I worked in a bank a woman used to come in with her dog and we'd give it a bone.  One day the dog collapsed in our lobby and the woman gave the dog mouth to mouth.  There was no way I was going to help her with that. The dog was just lying there and the woman was crying, because she thought her dog was dead.  Suddenly, the dog just got up and started walking."

(Cuban rider on July 4th) "You can't tell Americans what to do, that's what I love most about this country."

"I've never given an Uber driver a tip, but I have to give you one."(he did)

Her 15 year old daughter asked her, "which end of the year dance recital should I invite grandpa(Indian decent) too?" She said, "the one where you show off the least."

"I'm writing a movie script, something like "Lord of the Rings."

"The beach-all day, every day.

"I named my daughter Haven, becasue she's a safe haven from my addiction."

"I was born in Poland and lived in Canada, California, and Denver, but my favorite place, because of the people, is the Northeast where I lived for a semester of college."

Me: "Are you two married or dating?" Him: "We'll be married some day."  Me: "You're getting married Monday?" Him: "No, some day-I have to sell a lot more caskets for that."

"I may have to eat Ramin the rest of my life."

"I live in Manhatten, Kansas.  We call it "The Little Apple."

Me: "Where do you live in Ohio."  Her: "In the middle of nowhere. We don't have a stop light, but we have two restaurants."

"We had our high school graduation a month later, we had only 30 in our class."

"I've done the walk on the beach for five minutes and that's enough for me."

"I would have had straight A's in grammar school, but they decided to grade spelling."

Me: "Where do you live in Boston?" Rider: "We live in Fenway Park. We can see the stadium from our living room."

"The older I get the more grateful I am for what I have."

"We're now using two different bleach to clean and one of them makes our fingers bleed."

"I know some kids in high school who intentionally failed so they could repeat their senior year so they could play sports with their friends."

"I applied to a bunch of colleges in Florida where I lived and I was turned down by all of them. I applied to St. John's in New York just for "shits and giggles" and I was accepted.  My choice was to live at home and go to a community college or go to St. John's, so I went to St. John's."

(Woman from Ireland on visa to work here) I really enjoy the different cultures here in America.

When I told my rider that another rider gave me the name of Jeff-Ro No-Fro, he took off his hat showing his curly hair and said, "but I'm Jeff-Fro."(It wasn't a fro though)

"The other night we paid $125 to get from Broadway at The Beach to the southern part of 707."

Me: "You're from Minnesota, the friendliest state in the country." Rider: "It is now after I left."(funny, not friendly)

"Our supermarket has 3-4 times more online orders since the virus."

"For our buffet everyone has to wear a mask and they need to wear gloves when they go up and get food and they should change their gloves each time.  We are all watching and other customers tell us when someone isn't following the rules."

"The average house price in  the Myrtle Beach area is around $230,000.

"The people in Mississippi are hard-working, patriotic people."

"You really can't find people who can do the job."