What I Say When I Work

I'm enjoying walking into stores and offices and making deliveries and it's fun getting people to laugh at some of the things I say.  From time to time I go too far, but it does make the day go faster for them too.

I always need to get a signature on my hand held device so I ask them for their autograph.  Sometimes I'll say, "you do give out free autographs here, don't you?"  They always at least smile and sometimes they will play along and say, "I've never had someone ask for my autograph," and I add, "today is just the beginning." 

I then have to ask them for their last name and I type it in.  I always comment on the short, four letter last names, but recently had to type in "Day."  So I asked, "how do you spell it?", since it can be spelled "Dey", like the actress Susan Dey from The Partridge Family.  We then started discussing The Partridge Family(Dad- it's an old television show and musical group) and the songs they used to sing.  I had 2-3 women naming songs and I'm sure when I left they were still coming up with them.

I made a delivery in a Church office and when I asked for her autograph, the lady wanted to know if she should use her real name.  I said, "you can use any name you want, I won't tell."  She played along and said her name was Kristenbaum or Christinbaum or something like that.  I said, "Now I understand, you may want to shorten it." She did laugh, but I'm not sure she got the whole joke of a shorter name like "Christ" in a Church, but I laughed.(and you did too)

It's unusual to make a delivery to the same office three times in a week and when I did on Thursday I said to the woman, "If I come in again tomorrow does that make me a part-time employee? What benefits can I get?" She did laugh and although I did not have a delivery there on Friday I did drive right past her office and I was tempted, but I did not stop in for a laugh.

As I wheel in my hand truck I have to ask, "where would you like me to put these boxes?"  Sometimes I'll add, "I'll put them anywhere you want, except the roof."  That always gets a laugh, but there are times I zig-zag through many doors and into many corners of the office and it would be easier just going up to the roof and dropping them there.  I'd like to see someone explain to their boss that we got the delivery and the boxes are on the roof.

Finally, I have a smaller hand truck than you are used to seeing and it folds up very neatly and can be placed on the dashboard of my van on the passenger side.  A young girl in her twenties saw the hand truck and said, "that's cool and you have a cool looking van too."  Yes, I'm almost 58 years old and it took this long for someone to say I have cool things.(just wanted my kids to know)