March was a long month with me working on all five weekends. April was a short month with me working only three of the four weekends. I also drove my 1,000th Uber ride this month and hit a record of 33 rides in one day this month. Still, there were plenty of interesting and entertaining rides:
"MY PARENTS DIDN'T HAVE SEX UNTIL 1990" Just to be clear, my rider said that. I was talking about the Yankee-Red Sox baseball season in 1978 and I looked at him and said, "this is probably before your time." His response to being young made me laugh.
'ST. LOUIS....ST. LOUIS, MISSOURI" Sometimes a rider gets in my car and we talk like we're old friends and this college freshman was the perfect example. I can't even remember what was funny immediately, but then I asked her where she was from. After her above reply, I said, "is there another St. Louis somewhere?" She laughed at that and told me that sometimes people don't know where St. Louis is and I said, "it's in Missouri." Then, she told me there isn't much to see there and I said, "what about the ark?" We both immediately were laughing that I mispronounced the Arch and said Ark and now she'll forever be able to tell people about the Uber driver who asked her about the St. Louis Ark. I can't explain it, but it was probably a good thing this was a short ride, because I would have laughed too much with her on a long ride.
HE'S NOT LAURA: My first ride on a Sunday morning was supposed to be Laura. I watched a man about my age walking towards my car looking like he was going to work and I greeted him with this, "I'm guessing your nickname isn't Laura." He said I was correct, but I was amused that I greeted him like that. He was still waking up so I don't think he was as amused as I was and you're probably not either.
"THE ONLY PROBLEM WITH THE JERSEY SHORE IS THE BEACHES ARE FILLED WITH PEOPLE FROM NEW JERSEY" A rider told me that this is what is said in New Jersey.
"I DIDN'T GET TO LOOK LIKE THIS BY EXERCISING." He was a big guy, but very down to earth and easy to talk to. I dropped him off at a convenience store next to his apartment and offered to drive him over when he gave me those words of wisdom. However, even more interesting was his name, and he's the only one on the planet with this name. It's two names that are hyphenated and neither one is really a name. My internet attorney(my oldest daughter advised me not to use real names and since it is that unique I will not use it) The first word is either Wood, Forest or Trees and the second name is either Rain, Snow or Sleet. His Mom was a Native American and when she was a child she lived out near the woods and in bad weather she would stay under this big tree which would keep her dry. If my rider was a girl the two words would have been reversed, which wouldn't make any more sense, but it's quite a story.
THE KFC CHEF: He used to be a Divorce Lawyer with four offices before moving to Myrtle Beach to care for his very sick son. After several years of caring for him his son, his son passed away and then he eventually decided to work again. He got a job at KFC cooking and has a wonderful personality. He also must be a great cook since regular customers call the store to see if "Chicken Matt" is working today. (Ok, his real name is not Matt, but you get the idea) There are a number of things he does to make his chicken special and although I have not had KFC in South Carolina, I'm going to have try his chicken..
"IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE WEATHER IN MYRTLE BEACH, JUST WAIT FIVE MINUTES" This is a apparently a common saying here, since another passenger knew it when I told him.
THE STRIPPER: I can honestly tell you that growing up I never thought that one day a stripper would say to me, "oh, you're so nice, I'm going to give you a big tip." (she did) My conversation with her was a little different, but very interesting. She works a few nights a week and makes very good money, better than any other job she's had. The most she ever made was $4,000 in one night! She is saving her money to buy a house and got to school to be a ultra-sound technician. .
THE MINNESOTA GOODBYE: I learned this from a woman from Minnesota that before they leave an event/party, they start saying goodbye an hour earlier, because people there talk so much. Her and her daughter were going to Broadway at the Beach, which is one of our biggest tourist attractions. I told her ten year old to pick out the brochure behind my chair and she was going to be in charge of directions. I told her to open the map and that this was just for her and not her mom. I went a little further and told her to look at the back and in the upper top corner was her name. At this point I heard her mom laughing and this probably helped get me a very generous tip from her.(the mom)
THE SURGICAL TECHNOLOGIST TRAVELER: I had never heard about this career before this ride. However, I did mention it to my rider who was a stripper and she knew about it, so maybe I'm
just uninformed. You can go to school for two years and be trained to keep everything sanitary in the operating room. My rider travels to different cities to work in hospitals that are short on this profession. She gets a stipend for rent and food and gets paid well. It sounds like a great way to see the country.
"I GOT CUT BADLY AND WAS BLEEDING, BUT I'D DO IT AGAIN" One couple told me that they decided not to go to a place called "The Pounce Cat Cafe" in Charleston. I had a hard time not chuckling while they told me about the cafe that you can drink and pet rescue cats which are up for adoption. There is an admission fee and they suggest you spend an hour or two there. A second rider an hour later told me she was there and had a great time except for her scratches and her loss of blood. I can't believe the first couple missed out on this!
"THE GIANTS WIN THE PENNANT" AND "THE BAND IS ON THE FIELD" It was an unexpected fun ride when I picked up a thirty year-old woman who was a cook in a restaurant at Myrtle Beach Airport. She is a big sports fan and somehow I brought up the two greatest announcer calls in the history of sports. The Giants beating the Dodgers in 1951 with "the shot heard around the world" and college football's greatest play when the California Bears stunned John Elway's Stanford team with a bunch of laterals on the final play of the game in 1982 on a kickoff return with the band already on the field. My rider had never heard either of the calls and I told her it was her homework when she got home. She was so intrigued she took out her phone and played them and she loved it. She couldn't wait to tell her Dad about what she heard. It was a wonderful ride and she gave me a very generous tip, but I enjoyed hearing the calls again. If you've never heard the calls, you need to.
DRUDGER: That's what he called himself. He travels around our country excavating dirt to keep our shipping lanes open. It's apparently a very important job.
THE UBER DRIVER: What's unusual about the Uber driver I picked up? She lives in Costa Rica and is in logistics full-time. She drives for Uber illegally in her country. It has not been approved yet and there are many drivers who do it at risk of losing their vehicle if they are caught.
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