Finding Mr. or Ms. Right

Can you write about something you've never done? On a few occasions I've been asked by younger women for advice on how to find a husband or the right guy. (I was driving them in my Uber, they don't come up to me on the street)  Since I've been "Mr. Right" for many years and I've been married for almost 42 years I do give some advice.

On a successful marriage, I share three things:

1. It's not about finding the right person, it's about being the right person for your spouse.

2. Your partner is going to be better than you on some things. (In my case it's a lot of things) Let your spouse do those things, let them win.  On every team there are people who excel in certain areas and you're not going to be the best for everything.

3. Your partner will not agree on every subject with you.  They have their own experiences and thoughts and have not lived your exact life.  There is nothing wrong with disagreeing on how to eat cereal or the best time to eat dinner.

On finding the right person: 

1. Always look the best you can look.

2. Don't pretend to be someone else, be who you are.

3. Don't take yourself too seriously. Be proud of who you are, but if you are almost bald you can make hair jokes about yourself. People respond well to self-deprecating humor.

I recently read an article by Lile van der Weijden on finding "Mr. Right" and here are five quotes which are on target for finding Mr. or Ms. Right:

1. "You're going to attract someone who reflects where you are in life."

2. "Before you focus on finding your dream partner, focus on creating your dream life."

3. "The real work is not finding them, it's about building a wonderful life for yourself and becoming the type of person they'd naturally be drawn to."

4. "It's about being yourself in every single space, at any given time."

5. "When you're whole, you attract relationships that are rooted in balance, mutual respect, and love."

She did not learn those things in my Uber.