June Rider Comments

"In 2016 I bought a treadmill for $300 for my wife.  Last year a guy offered me $1,000 for it and I said, "No, one day my wife is going to use it."

Woman: "My grandmother used to say that red lipstick was for whores."

After she laughed when I told her about the guy who said to me, "I hope you're not a narc," the woman told me, "I'm going home to smoke weed and I smoke like a chimney." 

The female professor: "When you go to Hall's Chophouse they hug you and kiss you and it's the most action I get all month."

Young woman: "I think some people get their driver's license out of gumball machines."

Male chef: "when I was in prison years ago I did 10,000 push-ups a day for several months. I carry around a kettle bell that weighs 30 pounds so I can keep exercising."

During the ride I mentioned $10,000 and the five-year old girl said, " $10,000? I don't have any money." When the ride ended the five year-old gave me a $5 tip.  Me: "I thought you didn't have any money?"

She has a very outgoing personality: "I do cancer research, but I miss interacting with people." Me: "You should be an Uber driver for a few hours a week and donate the money to cancer research." Laughing, she said, "you're right, that would be fun."

When I told the older drummer that I once wrote a song about the life of a cigarette butt that I saw in the men's room, he said, "that's genius."

Guy planning a toga party: "You can come if you have a toga."

Male: "Your voice is just like a famous actor who does commercials." Moments later he added, "No, you sound just like my friend who plays the trumpet in the Church band."

"My friend called and he showed me a picture of him taking a blow while he was driving a semi-truck, it was crazy."

Telling the woman I've been married for 37 years and I met my wife at Burger King, she said, "It's nice to hear that your love blossomed at Burger King."

Retired male: "If I wrote a final letter it would be a letter of gratitude and Thanksgiving for all the blessings I've had in my life."

She loves this quote since her nickname is "sunshine:" "Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves!"

"My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and he thinks our relationship is new. I told him that if I can take my wig off in front of him, our relationship is not new anymore."

"I'm a Marine Scientist and when he proposed at Niagara Falls I was very nervous because he was holding the box with the ring upside down near the falls."

Older male vet: "yesterday there was a begger standing right there next to that sign that said, "help wanted." How can you beg for food when there's a job available? I guess I don't know the circumstances."

The male rider apologized for him and his wife on very little sleep: "we're usually a lot more fun, I swear."

After he heard that I write down my favorite rider comments, he said, "I'm feeling a lot of pressure to say something clever." Me: "you just did."

The male Spanish researcher with a thick accent said, "I understand about 90% English." Unfortunately, I was thinking, "I only understand 50% of what he's saying."

Male bartender's past real pick-up line for his wife: "You're out of here, you've had too much to drink. Okay, you can stay, but you have to give me your number."

Male: "When I start to drive I get very sleepy, I never got over a car putting me to sleep when I was a child."

Black male: "When I was a child I was in Exorcist 3 and I still get residuals from the 1989 movie."

"I asked my boyfriend for some trip money and he said, "is that what I'm for, money and sex?" I said, yes, and I'm going to get it as long as I can."

Male from New York on southern accents: "I don't have an accent, we talk right."

Male truck driver who hauls cars: "I just drove 4,700 miles in five days so I could get home to see my daughter's competition."

Female in her mid 20's: "My Mom told my Dad that they had to name me something unique.  My Dad said, "that's it, that's her name." She added, "so I'm Unique and my brother's name is Wulf."

Young man from New York who  details cars: "I have to slow down some here working with people from the south, I don't want to stand out too much."

"I just got a bad, 3 inch cut on my finger from juggling knives. When I was in the military I didn't want any job killing anyone.  I don't know how my soul would take that."

Female server: "My customer ordered takeout and when I gave him the bag he said he changed his mind and wanted it put on a plate to eat here.  I told him I wasn't going to take the food out now and he got angry.  He called a manager and insisted on a refund.  When he got the refund he gave it back to the manager as a tip right in front of me."

"I did not know that the Ravenel bridge was built to look like two sailboats and I give charters every week there."

"The intersection of Lockwood Circle is horrifically laid out."

Male golfer: "Last night was the first time in 16 years coming here my toes have touched the sand."

Nurse in Assisted Living place: "I feel obligated to continue wearing a mask so I don't infect others."

Young woman said she was "going through some things." "I haven't slept in four days."

Young woman from a small town in Wisconsin: "Why do people honk their horn so much here?"

"I met my boyfriend on a podcast.  He's a professional soccer player."

He tells his wife this frequently: "It must be hard for you to be the prettiest girl in the room."

Male Assistant Principal and part-time security cop: "My friends call me Andy Griffith without a gun."

Woman: "He was my neighbor and one day we met after a long period of time and I told him my husband left me.  He told me that I was a smart, beautiful and strong woman and I would be fine and that's how we're together now."

"When the Cavs won their championship, I was five minutes away from my brother.  We put the four kids in the car and drove over there and when we walked in he thought we were a jinx for coming.  My wife has a great picture of the two of us and my two brother in laws on our knees cheering the moment they won it all."

Male: "I'm from Texas and I don't like the Cowboys."

Woman: "I work with a bunch of underaged children."(really adults)

She: "I was supposed to be named Erica, but when I wasn't born on my grandmother's birthday, my parents let her name me Montana. I don't know why she named me Montana."

Young guy: "Pennsylvania is usually dark and gloomy."

As I tried to hand the woman her two bags are hands got tangled and she had one handle of each bag and my hand too.  She said, "I'm holding your hand too, don't tell your wife."

"I started filming and taking pictures of recreational sports and it's turned into a business, because it's something people want.  There was a kid who was being raised by an Aunt and they had him play football.  He was the worst player on the team, but I took a few pictures of him that made it seem like he was catching the ball and they loved it."

Male lawyer from New Mexico: "During the pandemic I was driving into work and there was no one on the road.  The twenty minute trip took me only five minutes."

Woman: "I live in a small town in Virginia where there is no Uber."

Male: "The thing I like best about driving a truck is the freedom and no boss."

Woman: "When I was going to retire my son sent me a questionnaire to find out my interests for what to do when I was retired and he ran them through a computer program, but I don't even remember what the results were."

"To me it seems the economy is always better when Democrats are in power."

"We just drove 900 miles from Indiana over two days on a motorcycle."

Woman who loves the cold: "I'm allergic to warm weather."

"The toughest part of being a property manager is getting skilled help."

 Me: "What's been the best part of your trip here?" Him:(dating for 7 years)  "The beach and her." Me: "Not in that order?" Him: "Right".

Male baseball fan: "That was the most entertaining Uber ride I've ever had."