MY FAVORITE RIDER COMMENTS IN MARCH

After losing her mom three years ago, she's been carrying her mom's ring in her purse and sometimes wearing it. "It has bad karma and I want you to take it and change the karma and give it to a Leo. My mom's birthday was August 15th and mine was August 17th." (Mine is August 19th. I gave the ring to a passenger's daughter who has been in the Army for three years)

I picked the 24-year-old guy up at the hospital and asked him how he was feeling. "Not that good. I died this morning. I was at a party and my friend gave me Adderall after drinking but it had fentanyl. I ordered an Uber and got in, but my driver saw I wasn't breathing and got me help. He saved my life. They hit me twice with Narcan, but the first one didn't work."

He: "My dad had me when he was 65 and my mom was 23. He had 22 kids, 67 grandchildren and 30-40 great grandchildren. I think the song, "Papa Was a Rolling Stone," was written about him."

She: "I was in a hurry in the bathroom and I went to brush my teeth and I grabbed the Preparation H and it was disgusting. There was no minty flavor. I probably needed a root canal after that."

She came to South Carolina about five years ago and was rooting for the South Carolina Gamecocks.. "I bought a hat that said, "Go C o c k s.  When I got home, no one knew what that meant, they thought I was a whore."

I asked, "What kind of work do you do?" She replied, " I'm a stripper on "Only Fans." My reply was, "How long have you been doing it?" She said, "Why do you want to get on it?"

Growing up in Los Angeles, he said, "I was a Bible-reading hooligan. One night we went to The Crystal Cathedral and I peed on a statue."

She actually asked once, "What kind of meat is on a veggie sub?"

"I'm a leap year baby, so I'm 25 today, (Feb. 28) but I've had only six birthdays."

After I talked with her a few minutes, the ninety-one year old former doctor said, "Now that we're intimate, I can tell you that Jake LaMotta was my oldest brother." (The boxer was a heavyweight champion and his nickname was "Raging Bull" which was a classic movie about his life)

He: "I don't want to go to a bar to watch sports-everyone talks and their idiots."

"We were in a Tesla that was driving itself and I asked the driver, "What do you do with your feet?" He answered, "I don't have any limbs."

Joking about his next driver, he said, "I'll either like him or I'll hate him and I'll hit him with a baseball bat." (really joking)

She: "When I was going to be a senior in high school I heard they were building a Senior Living Facility next to the school.  I told my parents I was going to move in with my friend."

She had chicken in her lunch bag and I asked, "Are you just chillin' today?" She said, "Yes, and I went to church in the morning." I said, "It's church, chillin', and chicken?" She replied, "That sums my day up right there."

I asked, "Have you ever gotten a gift from an Uber driver?" She said, "We had a driver in Charleston who offered us fortune cookies.  He had a bag on his dashboard and he had personal messages in the cookies. We didn't eat the cookies, we were kind of freaked out.

I asked, "What do you do for work?" She said, "I sell pictures of my feet." Joking, she then said, "I'm the funniest person you ever met."

I asked her where she was from and she said, "Ninety Six in South Carolina. We have two traffic lights and a Hardees."

German college student getting her MBA in South Carolina: "Everything in America is like a dream come true for me."

In charge of all media for the corporate offices of a major airline, he said, "I save them ten to fifteen million dollars a month."

She had a big smile on her face through most of the ride and I complimented her on it. She said, "I have to smile because I watch people die of cancer for a living."

In collections she said, "I like getting paid for being a bitch."

She said, "I've visited 89 countries in the world.  I was very impressed with Tibet."

I asked her, "Have I driven you before?" She said, "I don't know I don't usually pay attention to Ubers." 

Male bartender: "My worst days today are better than the best days of my life ten years ago. "I'm one of the most positive people on the planet. When you wake up in the morning, take the win."

She: "Once that first grandchild comes people will move to Kalamazoo to be there.  My mom put her house up for sale the day after my sister said she was expecting."

She was in Myrtle Beach to see a timeshare presentation and told me, "I went there by myself and they told me they didn't have enough reps. They gave me the $150 card and I didn't have to see the presentation. I don't think they thought I could afford it-I made $90,000 last year."

A group of former marines got together at the funeral of one their friends. "We put some commemorative marine coins in his coffin. He was the only one who didn't like Trump, so one guy threw a Trump 2024 coin in and said, 'If anything is going to wake him up, that is it."

I picked the older woman up at a hotel where she does laundry. She: "I'm legally blind and I have chronic heart failure. Sometimes it stops and I have to hit my chest to start it. I'm waiting for them to tell me I have six months to live." Why are you still working?" She: "I never filed for disability. I grew up learning that you should work, so I work."

A server for 18 years in Charleston, she told me about her amazing customer. "I had lost my 22-year-old son and returned to work. A regular customer who worked in a bank, noticed I wasn't myself and found out why.  He gave me a $200 tip.  Later that day he returned and handed me an envelope with $1,200 in it and said, 'Do something nice for yourself.' I bought a gravestone for my son."

MORE COMMENTS

I asked, "How did you two meet?" She: "A mutual friend re-kindled us."

Engaged she told me, "You're the first person I've told who spoke positive about marriage." (Married 41 years)

He: "Myrtle Beach is about eight years behind the northeast."

His name is Shep. "I've had drivers who didn't want to pick me up because of the famous guy named Shep who goes to get his drugs in an Uber."

The sales manager said, "I owe my career to soccer. I was playing on a company team and they offered me a job in sales."

My father-in-law worked for Major League Baseball and told me that they change the Yankee logo every year just slightly different shades of white due to copyright and legal issues."

After she was in the car, I asked her, "What are you up to today?" She replied, "I'm taking a ride with you right now."

I asked him how he and his wife met. "I was sitting in my car talking to random people and she just popped up on the screen."

He worked for five years in a very large convenience store. I said, "They should make you a manager." He replied, "Sadly they already have."

She: "This crazy weather confuses my knee."

He said after sneezing twice, "The most I've ever sneezed in a row was five times." He sneezed six times and I wrote him a note to show: "I heard him sneeze six straight times-Uber driver."

About to move to North Carolina near the water, he said, "We're naturals for the coastal area."

Talking about the good times the group of guys had last night, he said, "We lost some soldiers tonight."

She: "When I grew up I was terrified by dwarfs."

"When you find the right job you are eager and excited to do it."

"I was going to go into physical therapy, but I realized I don't like people.  I'm going to be a pilot."

Her family moved from Utah to South Carolina and she's still getting used to how friendly people are here: "I still think it's kind of weird."

He: "You don't have to have running shoes to run, but it helps."

Growing up in Myrtle Beach he said, "I learned how to say no and keep out of trouble."

High school math teacher in Washington D.C.: "I tell my students if you keep doing the work you'll get it."

"The woman is here from Iran for two months and she said, "Iran has the cheapest currency in the world."

There's a Ruth Chris that has a rent of $30,000 a month."

She: "My name Niko and it is polish and it means, "Victory for the people."

He was in his 50's when he ran with the bulls in Spain. "My sons did it two months earlier and my friend and I watched from a balcony before we did the run so we could see what happens.  There were 6 bulls that ran and 6 cows were there to calm the bulls down."

Physical therapist: "I knew I wanted to be in health care, because my mom was."

New to the country, she said, "You're first person I'm having a conversation with."

The young woman who is trying to figure out her career, told me, "I'm writing a historical romance novel."

She: "I used to think Donald Trump was such a jerk, but now I'm looking forward to seeing what he can do."

The young person majoring in elementary education said, "I understand kids better than adults."

He said about his friend sitting next to him, "She's of the greatest women I know."

COMMENTS ABOUT LILY, MY MANNEQUIN

I asked the Frenchwoman, "Do you have any mannequin stories?" She: "You mean for sex-toy parties?"

"Is she haunted?"

She: "A friend of my grandparents bought an old Victorian home in Massachusetts that Lizzie Bordon used to own.  Up in the bedroom window they have a mannequin head with a light shining on it so you can just see the shadow."

"He probably talks so much to the dummy, he forgets he has people in the back."

"She's all over the car."

"That is great."

"What's with the puppet?"

"She's awesome"

UNIQUE OCCUPATIONS

Kidney and liver surgeon

Vibration technician

Civil Engineer

Fishing Mate

Stripper on "Only Fans"

She: Navigates ships for the Navy

Geologist

Media Manager for major airline

Sells Racehorses

Teaches world class service in Guest Services

Manager of Port for oversees ships and spent ten years on a freighter

NEWEST COUNTRIES IN MY CAR:

Thank you to the civil engineer from Memphis who gave me this bill from Denmark-worth $14 here.

The future doctor gave me this bill from Kenya that he got when he worked 15 days in Nairobi and his group saw 12,000 people for medical assistance. He said, "It's a joy to share something like this."

COMMENTS ABOUT ME, MY CAR, AND THE RIDE

"I've never met someone like you."

"You're a breath of fresh air-you value people."

"You are epitome of a collector of a lot of good karma."

From Belgium: "This has to be the highlight of our trip so far."

Getting in the car, "Is there a parade?"

"I told my friend that I just met one of the most incredible people."

"You made my morning."

"That's awesome and I'm not lying."

"This was the best transportation experience I've ever had."

"You are so lovely."

"I wish there were more people like you in the world."

"This was very educational."

"I love that you love your job."

"This is the job that gives you the satisfaction and pleasure that you want working."

My sixth favorite rider, "The attitude adjuster," said, "You're a gift to this culture."

"A ride I'll never forget."

"This was a pleasure."

"What a great idea."

"I love your car."

"This is the most interesting Uber I've ever had."

"You have been the most fantastic driver, thank you sincerely."

She: "This was one of the two best Ubers I've been in." Me: "One of the two best?" She: Laughing she said, "It' the best one I've been in this year." 

"This has been a real treat."

"You made my day a lot better."

"I took pictures to show everyone."

"This was a great ride."

"This has been one of the best experiences I've ever had."

"I love your pictures."

"I don't think we could have gotten anyone better."

"I love your car."

"Museum was great."

"I enjoyed my Uber ride so much."

"Thank you for treating us so well."

"This has been a wonderful ride."

"That was an amazing ride."

"You made my day."

"This is sick."

"This is a beautiful car."

"I am very happy."

"It was so nice meeting you."

"Awesome"

"You were very entertaining."

"This is kind of crazy."

"It's so neat."

"This was the best Uber I've ever had."

"I've never seen anything like this."

"Thank you for all the stories."'

"Very impressive"

"I appreciate the concept."

MY FAVORITE RIDERS OF MARCH 2025 PART 2

                                                             

"TOUGH TIMES NEVER LAST, BUT TOUGH PEOPLE DO"

Robert Schuller was a very famous pastor out in California and he published the book in 1983.  I had to tell my rider about it, because her story was such an extraordinary one of someone being resilient. Over the last dozen years she's had a number of extremely difficult personal challenges, starting with her mom passing away from cancer when she was 18.  I was driving her and a friend to get her car that was impounded after she was arrested after refusing a breathalyzer test.  She had just been released from the hospital after surgery and she could not walk a straight line, so she was arrested.

She is in medical school working on being an oncologist to diagnosing and treating cancer.  I complimented her on her big smile and she said,  "I have to smile because I watch people dying from cancer for a living." I suggested to her that she should focus on all the good things she has going for her and not the bad luck or bad Karma she's been experiencing.  I said she was obviously bright and a people person and she was dedicated to doing something to help others.  She has a great future ahead of her and she was right when she said, "I'm resilient."  You can do it!

HE DIED THAT MORNING

I picked him up from a hospital around 10:30 am on a Sunday morning.  I asked him how he was feeling and he said, "Not that good, I died this morning." It was a short ride and it was the most shocking thing someone has said to me in my car and he was serious.

The 24-year-old is in sales and he was mentally trying to get through what happened to him only ten hours ago. "I was at a party and a friend gave me Adderall after drinking, but it had fentanyl. I ordered an Uber and got in, but my driver saw I wasn't breathing and got me help. He saved my life. They hit me twice with Narcan, but the first one didn't work."

I told him to get some rest and that he obviously was very fortunate and received a gift today and I wished him well. Congratulations to the Uber driver and the medical staff that was able to save his life.

25 YEARS OLD WITH  SIX BIRTHDAYS

It was 5 am on March 1, when I picked of four friends in their early twenties and they were trying to get home after a long night.  One of the girls told me that she was a "Leap Year Baby" and she just turned 25. Her actual birthday did not exist since there were only 28 days in the month. She celebrated on the 28th and now it was the first. She told me, "I've only had six birthdays my whole life, one was last year." She has a birthday every four years and she looked a lot older than 6.

SERVING KINDNESS

She has been a server for eighteen years and she was a delight.  I would love to have her serve me at any restaurant.  I could tell she was very good at what she does and she was smiling when she talked to me. She told me one of the most incredible stories I have heard in my car and it was after the worst moment in her life.

She lost her 22-year-old son who died at a party.  Here's her story: "I went back to work and the first day one of my regular customers could tell that there was something wrong and he asked one of my co-workers. He works in a bank and he tipped me $200.  Later that day he came back and gave me an envelope and said, 'Do something nice for yourself. The envelope had $1,200." It was an extraordinary gesture by her customer, but I really felt for her when she told me that she bought a gravestone for her son with the money.

WOULD YOU LIKE A FISHING MATE?

He loves to fish and for seven years he's been working as a fishing mate, doing work on boats and handling all the fishing activities. Working for himself he's worked for, "Wealthy, famous, and crazy people." He is currently working on an eight million dollar fishing boat. He also worked for country music singer, Alan Jackson, for a whole year. His favorite place to travel is the Caribbean islands.

SHE'S AS SHARP AS A...KNIFE?

The older woman slowly got in my car and I had no idea how much fun this ride would be.  I said to her, "What are you up to today?" She answered quickly, "I'm driving with you right now." She was actually going to get her hair done.  She told me she was a chiropractic doctor and she's retired.  I asked her how long ago she retired and she replied, "I'm ninety-one, you do the math." Originally from the Bronx, she was making me laugh, but she had that northeastern toughness. She loves to read and told me she reads a book a week.

After a few minutes she said, "Now that we're intimate I can tell you that my oldest brother was Jake LaMotta." He was a former heavyweight champion of the world and his nickname was "Raging Bull."  The movie, "Raging Bull", starring Robert DeNiro, was his life story and is recognized as one of the all-time great movies.  He had passed away a few years back and I asked her what he did after he retired. She told me he was a celebrity and helped open a lot of places and he sold a lot of memorabilia.  She really was a delight and could have passed for 71 years old.

MY FAVORITE RIDERS IN MARCH 2025 PART 1

March was a very special month with so many interesting stories. These first three rides will be three of the best rides of 2025 and I will enjoy sharing them with many others.  Part 2 of my favorite March riders will be out in a few days.

 GOOD VIBRATIONS ON SHIPS

I have driven people with over two hundred different occupations, but this was a new one for me.  Her position is Vibration Technician and she works in the engine rooms on ships.  She checks and fixes some of the machines so they work perfectly. She was going to go to school for medicine, but took the job to save money.  Her dad does the same work and he was able to help her get the job and he helped with her training.

In her mid-twenties (?) she said, "I often get confused with being someone's wife or girlfriend when I get on a ship." She frequently is the only woman on the ship. She is outgoing, well-spoken, and has a very big smile and I have no doubt she would be successful in sales or anything else she attempts to do. 

It was a great ride from the airport and even better when she gave me a bill for my 62nd country,  Australia, with Queen Elizabeth. She also gave me a hat from the company she works for which sits on my dashboard.  Her picture is front and center in my car and underneath it says, "Charleston Technician."

If that wasn't enough, when she went inside her house, I was cleaning my car up and she came out with a friend of hers.  She told me, "I told my friend I just met one of the most incredible people."  Her friend got the tour of my museum and gave me one of the best compliments I've had when she said, "You're a breath of fresh air, you value people." Rides do not get much better than this...ever.

THE GOOD KARMA GIFT

This month I drove two different women in Mt. Pleasant, South Carolina and they led me to one of the best moments in my almost seven years of driving.  At the beginning of the month I picked a woman up on a Sunday at 8 am. She was barely awake, on no sleep, and managed to say hello before looking at her car.  I left her alone until I saw her looking at the money and pictures of riders in my car. We had a conversation and I got a few smiles and she woke up.  I told her some riders get upset that they don't have something to give me for my car and she said she did.

She's been carrying her mom's ring for three years since she passed and it's been bad karma for her maybe because they weren't on good terms at the end. She wanted me to take the ring, (maybe worth $130) and she said, "Change the Karma and give it to a Leo." She and her mom were born August 15th and 17th and then I told her I was born on the 19th of August. She was upset about the ring and I agreed to take it, but if she changed her mind I would return it.  I took her picture with the ring and she looked nothing like the woman I picked up and I put the words, "Good Karma" under it and hung it in my car.

A few hours later, I picked up a woman whose daughter was born August 14th and she was visiting in two weeks.  She is serving in the Army and I thought it be cool to give the ring to a woman serving our country. The ring owner loved the idea, so I set it up with the mom.

I would have picked them up on my time for no money, but my car had to be towed. I bribed the tow truck driver to stop at a gas station and the mother and daughter met me. I told the story to the daughter and she was surprised and she liked the ring.  I asked her if she would like this gift from my passenger and she accepted.  I thanked her for serving and told her if anyone doubts support for those who serve, she will always have this story and ring.

When I told the previous ring owner she said, "I'm so happy that she likes it! That brings me joy." 

The picture of the mom and her daughter will hang next to the "Good Karma" woman and underneath their picture below it will say- "The Gift." This story will be one of the best I have and it will be enjoyed by hundreds or thousands of riders in the future."

                                                        

KASSI-ISMS FROM CALIFORNIA

She and her two friends were in Charleston for her baccalaureate party and she put on a hysterical performance.  I'm going to have to consider her one of the top five funniest women that I have driven the past seven years.  I'm not even sure which of these are the funniest comments, but you decide:

1. "When I was a senior in high school I heard that they were building a senior living home next to the high school. I told my parents that my friend and I were going to move in there."

2. Her friend told me that Kassi once asked, "What meat is on a veggie sub?"

3. "I came to South Carolina about five years ago and I was rooting for the South Carolina Gamecocks. I bought a hat that said, "Go C o c k s ." When I got home, no one knew what that meant, they thought I was a whore."

4. "We were in a Tesla that was driving itself and I asked the driver, "What do you do with your feet?" He answered, "I don't have any limbs."

5. "I was in a hurry in the bathroom and I went to brush my teeth and I grabbed the Preparation H and it was disgusting. There was no minty flavor.  I probably needed a root canal after that."

THE SELF-MADE MAN

He was impressive and he told me that he was, "A self-made man." He talked like a very successful man.  "I turn lemons into lemonade; I don't believe in 'woe's me.' " He works for a big airline and handles all the media content for the corporate staff.  He was on vacation, but they don't like him to be away. He explained, "I save them $10-15 million dollars a month." He's overcome some personal challenges and he's very confident he's in the right place. I think the company is very thankful to have him. I wish I had more time to talk to him.

What's Wrong With Me Today?

"Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a comb across my head."

These two lines are from The Beatles classic song, "A Day in the Life." One of the reasons this song is so special is that it is two different songs written by two different writers (Paul McCartney and John Lennon) and the music makes the two songs one. 

Did you ever think you had two different bodies? One body is the one you go to bed with and the next morning when you wake up, you have a different body. Something has changed from the night before and you have no idea how it happened.

This may only happen as you're getting older: you have an ache or pain or cut the next morning and you try to figure out how it got there. I've had this happen several times recently. Here are some examples:

1.  A couple days ago, when I looked in the mirror in the morning, I had a very small cut on my face and this was before I shaved. Did I scratch myself when I was asleep?

2. A few days before that I had a larger scratch on my hand.  It is healing since I've been putting medicine on it, but did our dog scratch me? How come I never feel these things happen? 

3. A couple weeks ago I had one of the most unusual surprises in the morning.  I had a bump under my thumb on my wrist.  It looked like I had banged my hand, but it wasn't sore and it didn't hurt. My wife looked it up and it's a ganglion cyst, which sounds a lot worse than it really is.  I knew it wasn't serious and I put some ice on it and since it didn't hurt and it's not in a very visible place, I just forgot about it.

However, in writing this blog I looked it up and if you ice it or heat it regularly, it can disappear. I am doing that regularly now, but I was amused at some of the things I looked up.  People most at risk are between the ages of 15 and 40 and female.  Repetitive hand actions could also be a cause of it, such as writing too many blogs. (I made that last part up)  The cause is unknown, but it may really be the time I spend on the computer. It can also be treated with medicine which I may look into.

4. If I haven't grossed you out enough with these minor medical problems, just wait,  I'm only 64 years old.  I am not a very good patient, so sometime a year or two ago I noticed that my big toe had two nails. When that happened I have no idea, but I probably just woke up one morning and my other body had this double nail pictured below.

That is a close-up picture, my toe isn't that big. It didn't hurt and unfortunately I could not peal the second nail off, so I figured it would just fall off by itself. (Really)  It did not happen and then my wife saw it.  I was getting a check-up and my doctor said I should soak it regularly and then peel it off.  I soaked and soaked and soaked, but I didn't make much progress and got tired of soaking it.  Finally, I gave into my wife and let her work on it and it looks better, but there's still more of a nail to pull off.  Maybe it will fall off so she doesn't have to work on it more?

I hope you're waking up each morning with the same body you went to sleep with.

Is This The Beginning of Something?

Recently I saw a picture online of the inside of the inside front of an Uber driver's car.  In the middle under the console there were a bunch of things like tissues, water, candy for riders, but there was something that really stood out.  There were a number a colorful index cards on them with writing. The driver told me that one day a passenger wrote a note and stuck it on his seat in appreciation for the ride.  Soon, other people were leaving notes with all different messages and he's collected them.

Could that happen in an airplane? Yes, it can and this is the story. Southwest flight attendant, John McKay took a notebook with him on a flight in 2023 and gave it out to passengers and offered them the opportunity of writing something in his book. The response he got was incredible. People wrote inspiring messages, favorite poems, drawings, jokes, and personal feelings about what they are going through in their life. People hugged him and thanked him and it was very rewarding for him.

His first notebook is complete and he is working on a second one which is now called, "This is the Beginning of Anything You Want." He said, "You can kind of tell sometimes that somebody needs to see something. And I've gotten some really amazing responses from it. People have told me that it feels like medicine to them."

He said that he likes to, "Brighten people's day," which is something I can relate to. He got the idea when he read on the internet of a frequent traveler who had done something similar. 

You never know when one good idea can give you another good idea.  Spread your sunshine the way you want to.  You never know what can happen-maybe this is the beginning?

What About King Tut?

I recently saw a clip of comedian Steve Martin doing his surprise hit song, "King Tut," back in 1978. The next day, I read an article about the discovery of King Tutankhamun's tomb on November 4, 1922 in The Valley of the Kings in Egypt.  A week later, it was in the news that they just discovered the first royal tomb since King Tut and it's the tomb of King Thutmose 11.

King Tuts' Tomb had been hidden for over 3,000 years and they found 5,000 artifacts in the tomb.  There were a few items that I found very interesting, so here they are with my comments.

1. THE MANNEQUIN: We might as well start with it since now I know that I had something in common with King Tut-we both had mannequins.  He had a very large wardrobe and was supposedly, "A snappy dresser." I wonder what that really means in 1300 BC.  They found hundreds of his clothes and he used this mannequin to put clothes on it to figure out what he should wear.  I'm just glad my wife doesn't have one of these.

2. BOARD GAMES: Since Monopoly and air hockey were not invented yet, his board games looked a little primitive.  They only found four games and this was one of the them below. The games were made of wood, ebony and ivory too.  They played, "The game of 20 and Senet." The game of 20 was not, "20 questions," which came much later. Board games were a very big thing in ancient times.

3. SANDALS: The mummy was found wearing these sandals and they are 11.6 inches long.  He did not wear them when he was alive and it's a very good thing. These do not look comfortable.  I have enough problems walking in the sand, this would make it almost impossible to do that. I think it would hurt.

4. THRONE: It looks nice, but would you sit in this for more than a minute? I don't think so, it looks very uncomfortable and I think with his wealth he would have bought a La-Z-Boy.  Especially, when he was a boy, right?

5.  BREASTPLATE:   Would you put this anywhere near your chest? It's colorful, but I can't imagine wearing that. And women complain about wearing a bra? Maybe it was for his afterlife?

6. CANOPIC JARS: Yes, they are jars and inside the jars are not cookies or jam.  This is where they preserved his organs. His liver and lungs were found in the below jars among other things.  I believe when he showed off his palace, he probably did not explain what was going to go in these.

7. THE WOODEN BOX: You would think something that looked so spectacular would have a much better name, right? There are hunting scenes all around this box.  I guess he really liked to hunt.

The legend was that if you disturbed King Tuts' tomb, you would die. Howard Carter is given credit for the discovery and although he lived another seventeen years, his benefactor did die suddenly soon after one of the great discoveries in all of history. 

Steve Martin, the comedian, is alive and still funny.  This is how he looked singing, "King Tut."

               

"My Colon Had The Highest Score"

Sometimes it is impossible to avoid writing a blog about something.  This is not just something, it's my wife's colonoscopy this past week.  It's pretty serious stuff as you probably know. My wife got great news and now she is very proud and told me at the dinner table, "My colon had the highest score."  

I always brag about my wife and how amazing she is and all the incredible things she does well.  Now, I can brag about her colon. She got a 9 score out of a possible 9, perfect, for cleanliness. I would have shared pictures of her colon with you, but she might be framing them. Before we went to bed that night, she said, "I love the pictures." This picture below shows how happy she is.

This is not a picture of my wife jumping, her body was not in the jumping mood when we got home.

You take a whole day before the big event cleaning yourself out.  You drink only liquids and then drink "Drano" and hope that it all comes out.  And it certainly does-more than you ever thought could come out.  You hit 10,000 steps going to and from the bathroom and just like on a treadmill, sometimes you pick up the speed to get where you need to be.

The big event took 11 minutes and we spent 3 hours and 20 minutes at the hospital.  I am not complaining.  I read eighty pages of a book that was published forty-five years ago.  In the recovery room, the nurse was Joe, and he was a true professional.  My wife told him he had a great voice and could be in radio. She was still a little groggy, but I'm sure it made his day.

My wife told me the secret to her colon success: she did everything she was supposed to do to prepare for the big event. She said that some people don't follow the detailed directions they are given.  Are you kidding me? Spend a day in the bathroom preparing and forfeit your chance to have a perfect colon and you don't follow the directions?

My wife and I are a good team, she has a perfect colon and my eyes at age 64 don't need glasses and probably won't in my seventies!(I do have it in writing from the optometrist) The next time she mentions her perfect colon, I will tell her this: I have perfect eyes.