Ralph The Tic?

Have you ever been driving at 75 mph in your car and you notice something in your car? In the corner of my eye I saw a ladybug on my window just to my right. It was about 3/4th of the way up the window and it wasn't moving. I decided not to do anything. I was leaving it up to him and I decided to call him Ralph. (Yes they can be male or female according to Mr. Google.)

After about an hour of staying put, he moved down the window and then back up it.  I noticed it had eight legs. A ladybug doesn't have eight legs, does it? (Mr. Google said six legs.) Whatever it was, it did get a lot of exercise.  This is how it looked on my window-it's right above the big tree.

I'm not sure if it was trying to get out of the car or just get its steps in.  My wife woke up and said that it looked like a tic.  Does a tic have six legs or eight legs? I am keeping Mr. Google very busy today and he said that tics have eight legs.

When we stopped at a rest stop, I opened the door and swatted at it.  My wife said, "What did you call it?" I answered, "Dead." The tic was dead, but here's a better picture of it below.  It looks like a drone or a small helicopter and now you've read my first story on our vacation.

It's Grandparent's Day!

Okay, it was Grandparents' Day this past Sunday and for the first time, my wife and I are grandparents! What do you know about Grandparents' Day? Here's the rundown on what you and I did not know:

It all started in 1969 when a nine-year-old boy, Russell Capper, sent a letter to President Nixon suggesting that there was a special day for grandparents. He got a letter back from President Nixon's personal secretary, Rose Mary Woods, saying that there needed to be a congressional resolution for that to happen.

In 1973, a resolution was introduced in the Senate, after being promoted by a West Virginia housewife, Marian McQuade. Finally, it was passed in 1977 and on August 3, 1978, President Jimmy Carter, signed it into law. The first Sunday after Labor Day would be recognized as Grandparents' Day.

Fast forward exactly forty-six years later, our first grandchild, Riley, was born in Colorado.  Although we did not get to see her since we are in Myrtle Beach, we did get this adorable picture of her at about five weeks old. I'm pretty sure she is saying, "Happy Grandparents' Day!"

MY MOST MEMORABLE VACATION QUOTES-PART 2

 I am not the only who enjoyed these comments, I'm just the only one who wrote them down.

16. "She's so small." Someone else replied, "That's how most of them are."

They were talking about the baby and both comments were pretty obvious.

17. "Spicy food can make your butt feel spicy."

I don't like spicy food and I probably would not like my butt to feel spicy, would you?

18. "He was snoring so loud they were picking him up for the baby's hearing test."

It was the dad and not me, the grandpa, who was snoring too loud. They heard him clearly, but could not hear if the baby could hear?

19. "The shepherd's pie has a lot of vegetables, he's going to have a great poop!"

Fortunately I can tell you that I ate the pie, but this did not happen.

20. "I can't wait to grow up and get old."

Obviously from someone short on experience, but with plenty of humor.

21. "Riley is like the size of a banana."

I'm not sure who would like a baby to be compared to a banana, but she was.

22. "Is it a chicaterie  or a charcuterie board?"

Either way, it was not made.

23. "Odin looks like a man in his 30's smoking a cigar."

I have to admit as you see below, he does.

24. "The hospital wanted her (the baby) to poop only once, but she pooped seven times."  "Is there a record wall."

Two different people said these things, but I'm probably the only one to ever write something like this down.

25. "Next week the baby may be walking. She'll be speaking French soon."

I didn't walk for 19 months and I took French in Junior High School because my friends did. This is one very independent baby.

26. "A lot of people dip french fries in ice cream."

This cannot be a real thing.  I like french fries and I like ice cream, but together? NO!

27. "People always ask, 'Is that a freshie?' You can probably get that reaction by picking up random babies."

I have never heard babies referred to as "Freshies," but I don't think you can walk around a supermarket lifting random babies up.

28. "Uh, What's'er face? We'll name our kid, What's'er Martin."

Yes, the last name would be Martin, but that first name will not cut it.

29. "Forgetacini."

We were supposed to remember  to take the fettuccine home with us, but we did not.

30. "It looks like a brain."

I think this is a strectch. This looked and tasted incredible- chicken parm pizza

31. "As a therapist, what would you ask the buffalo?

I asked the question to my brother-in-law as we sat next to the below buffalo as we ate dinner.  He answered, "Why does everyone pick on you? Do you really have wings?"

32. "I can't wait until I'm in the car when my daughter is pulled over speeding."

I did not say this.

33. "It's surprising how unfunny you are."  "I'm sorry you were raised in a funny family."

I'm not sure which line is funnier and I don't know who said what about whom? It's a good one to end on.

MY MOST MEMORABLE RIDER COMMENTS IN AUGUST

 It was a very short month of driving for me, but here are my rider comments:

"Our Uber driver yesterday was a little quirky. At one point he said, "I can't see too well anymore and then he was talking to us as if he was talking through a radio to the back seat."

His name is Lauren and he told me, "Uber drivers are always looking for a girl, I'm not even a good- looking dude."

I asked the three girls of the bachelorette party, "What is something unique or unusual about the bride to be?" With her sitting in the car, someone said, "She has a crooked elbow." (Broken twice)

The 27-year-old from North Carolina said, "When I was in college I did work in marketing and made $100,000. I then decided to be a rapper." With his music business he works with four artists and is about to do a three-city tour performing. He added, "I also wrote a children's book which did very well on Amazon."

"My last Uber driver was 70 years old and he said he's in a rock band. He played some music and then started rocking out."

She surprised me when she said, "I became an attorney so I could work for a non-profit."

I asked the trumpet player, "What are you going to do when you graduate with a master's in music?" He replied, I'm going spend time enjoying my life."

I asked the couple married 62 years, "What's the secret to a successful marriage?" They said, "Show love and respect to each other and a sense of humor helps."

I asked the Navy guy who had been on a nuclear sub, "Did you pull into any foreign ports?" He said, "No, they are not usually fond of nuclear missiles."

"When I came to the South I couldn't understand why everyone was waving at me."

She: "If you want a bachelorette party to drink, go to Nashville, but if you want to shop, come to Charleston."

He: "When I was in Dubai they had a ski resort in a mall. They go all out to keep people cool."

The couple had been dating five years and I said to the guy, "When are you going to pop the question?" His girlfriend started laughing and said, "Never."

From Wisconsin he said, "We are a drunken state. We have some of the drunkest cities in the country."

She: "The beaches in California are not as nice as the beaches in Myrtle Beach."

He: "When I was in eighth grade I was a running back and I received a trophy from Walter Payton at an awards ceremony."

She said, "Charlotte is the best place in the world to live."

"I was in Chicago during the Democratic Convention and I was stuck there two days trying to get a flight out."

She golfed in the Myrtle Beach tournament and said, "I had 35 friends here and I made others too."

The group of four girls said about the rest of the girls, "They are boring."

UNUSUAL OCCUPATIONS

Cave Tour Guide

COMMENTS ABOUT LILY, MY MANNEQUIN

Telling him that some people are afraid of mannequins, he said, "You can count on me not to be afraid of mannequins."

"She's cool."

"She's beautiful."

COMMENTS ABOUT ME AND MY CAR

"This was a great experience. Thank you for your time."

"Keep spreading sunshine."

"This was the best ride we've ever had and it was only two miles."

"This was a fantastic experience."

"Unfortunately, I can only contribute with American money."

"I like your style."

"Best ride we've ever had."

"You're a genius."

"You're the best Uber driver around."

From Minnesota, he said, "You give off Minnesota vibes."

"You're one of a kind."

"This was super cool, thanks for sharing."

"I love this car."

"I think you love your job." 

"This was one of the best Ubers we've ever had."

"You have the audacity to show these bills."

"I love this."

"This was the best ride ever."

"This is way too cool."

"I love what you did here."

"You were so inciteful."