Happiness and Marriage

During the past month I have come across a number of articles on happiness, what is happy and who is happier? A recent study by the University of Chicago after evaluating thousands of Americans, said that, "The most important differentiator" in being happy is a good marriage.  It doesn't mean that people who are not married are not happy or that all married people are happy, but it did show a 30 point difference for married men and women compared to unmarried men and women.

They concluded that the reason levels of happiness have decreased over the years is due to the falling marriage rates.  Since 1970 the number of people who get married has dropped 60% and since 1990 the drop is 40%.  It is estimated that only half of the people in the country are married, down from 72% in 1960.  They concluded that if marriage rates increased, so would the level of happiness.

This coming Monday, my wife and I will celebrate forty years of marriage.  When I drive a newly engaged or married couple somewhere I usually say, "I wish you forty years of happiness, and after that it's up to you."  They usually laugh, but they do appreciate the kind words.

A Wall Street Journal-NORC poll showed that 12% of the people in the United States who were the happiest, "Are those with strong emotional ties to others."  According to a study of over 1,000 people, women are happier than men and people over 60 are happier than younger adults.  They said that happier people tend to believe marriage is important, they believe in God and in helping their community.

Robert Waldinger, a professor of psychiatry at the Harvard Medical School, gave a speech in 2015 on a seventy-five year study of men and happiness.  The speech has been watched by forty-five million people and it runs only twelve minutes long.  The conclusion of this study is simple, "Good relationships keep us happier and healthier."

I read recently about a General Social Survey that has been put out since 1972 and they had similar results. They found that married people tend to be 30% happier than unmarried people, people who trust others are happier and the Northeast is the unhappiest region.

Finally, the article about "The World's Happiest Man," who was given that title by the media.  His name is Matthieu Ricard, who is an ordained Buddhist Monk.  He has written many books including on the subject of happiness. His advice for your happiness is this, "If you can, as much as possible, cultivate that quality of human warmth, wanting genuinely for other people to be happy." He said, "That's what I call happiness.  It's not as if all the time you jump for joy. Happiness is more like your baseline. It's where you come to after the ups and downs, the joy and sorrows."

It sounds a lot like a good marriage to me.  Below is a picture of the happiest day in my life.  It was taken forty years ago this Monday, August 28, 1983. Thank you to my wife for keeping me happy and healthy for all these years. Happy anniversary princess.