August Rider Quotes

"HE WAS RAPPING TOO HARD LAST NIGHT" When another passenger heard my story of the rapper falling asleep in my car, she made me laugh with her quick remark.

"GHOST SHOPPING IS WHEN YOUR WIFE STAYS AT HOME AND SHOPS"  He told me this with his wife sitting next to him.  He then told me, "no one sees nothing."  I told him I could understand why they call it "ghost shopping", "when the bills come in, it's scary."

"YOU SHOULD MAKE DINNER FOR YOUR WIFE, MAKE HER CURRIED CHICKEN!"  I told her I was meeting my wife for dinner soon.  After her comment I told her that I don't cook.  "My wife cooks and I eat."

"MY WIFE JUST ATE A LOT OF LOBSTER CRAB-THERE'S STILL SOME ON HER SHIRT!"

"HE'S BEEN MISSING FOR 24 HOURS" I picked up several guys who were part of a bachelor party and I asked if any of them were the bachelor.

"WHEN YOU LIVE IN MY HOUSE, YOU LISTEN TO MY MUSIC"  My rider was telling me how much she enjoys The Beatles and Queen, which are her Mom's favorite groups.  She had had a rough morning and after telling her to take her Mom to see the movie "Yesterday", she got out of the car and said to me, "thank you, you made my morning".

"I'M AS AMERICANIZED AS SHIT. WHEN I FEEL STUPID, I WATCH SOCCER."  The guy from Latvia has been here for 20 years and I picked him up from a bar where he was actually watching soccer.

She said, "I CAN'T EVEN PEE IN TWO MINUTES."

As the student from Poland waived goodbye to her friends, tears fell from her eyes and I asked, "where are you headed?"  She said, "I'M GOING TO HAWAII FOR 12 DAYS."

"MYRTLE BEACH IS LIKE A DIFFERENT PLANET THAN ROMANIA." I asked the young guy who was working here on a short visa if he liked it in Myrtle Beach.

"I LITERALLY SKIPPED HALF OF MY SENIOR YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL, BUT SINCE I HAD STRAIGHT A'S, I WAS ABLE TO GRADUATE." She was well spoken and very believable, but she didn't like going to school so she didn't.  It's pretty amazing that she was able to graduate missing half her senior year.

"I HEARD THERE ARE SHARKS ON THE BEACH!"  I assured the tourist that the sharks here stay in the water."

"THE LARGEST ARCADE IN THE UNITED STATES IS IN NEW HAMPSHIRE."  I bet you just learned something, I  learned it from my New Hampshire rider.

"I PAY $22,000 A YEAR IN PROPERTY TAXES FOR MY HOUSE IN SAN FRANCISCO."  I told my rider I would never forget that number; it's even more insane than California drivers paying $4.00 per gallon of gas.

"I'D LIKE TO TRAVEL WHEN SOMEONE ELSE IS PAYING FOR THE TICKET." The guy was paying $1,200 to fly to Japan to visit his fiancee.

"I MOVED DOWN HERE TO GET AWAY FROM ALL THE TERRIBLE PEOPLE IN NEW YORK."  I don't think he realizes how many New Yorkers' live in the Myrtle Beach area.

"MASTERS IS  A FIRST CLASS ORGANIZATION" Masters is a Gentleman's Club in Myrtle Beach.

"SINCE THE WORLD IS ENDING SOON, WE'LL BE OKAY IN BUFFALO."  I asked her how she gets through the rough Buffalo winters.

"DO YOU HAVE ANY MUSLIM FRIENDS?" This is the first time anyone ever asked me this question.  My two riders were going to a Mosque and it wasn't open yet on Sunday morning.

"THEY HAVE THIS LITTLE YACHT CLUB THING."  They were a young couple and did not look like "yacht club people," so I don't know how they got into it.  You can tell they didn't belong by how he said it.

"I'LL HAVE PLENTY OF TIME TO REST WHEN I RETIRE," said the 23-year old as I took him home to take a power nap at 6:30 am on a Sunday morning.  He works two full-time jobs in Myrtle Beach, eighty hours a week.

"I CAN'T WAIT TO GO HOME SO I CAN SLEEP ALL DAY." Another young person working here on a visa just wants to go back home so she can get some rest.

"I WISH PEOPLE WOULD BE MORE SUPPORTIVE OF THEIR LOCAL POLICE."  The Bronx cop and I discussed gun control and some of the problems cops have today.  He said, "common sense isn't common anymore."

"YOU'RE GOING TO A FANTASY MEETING WITH A BUNCH OF WOMEN?" My female rider's previous Uber driver said this, not realizing it was a Women's Fantasy Football Draft.

"OVER 80% OF ALL THE CASES I WORK ON ARE DRUG RELATED" The prosecuting attorney from New Jersey told me a lot about the difficulties he and his colleagues are having in Morris County.

"YOU HAVE A LOT OF HAIR ON YOUR HEAD," the barber said.  He told me I've only lost 30% of my hair.  When I told him that my wife has been cutting my hair for over 30 years, he said, "maybe that's why you lost so much."

"NEW YORK WAS CROWDED, NOISY, DIRTY AND THERE WAS DRUGS EVERYWHERE."  The student from China had just visited New York and was clearly not impressed.